Saturday, August 13, 2011

Day 164 of 365

I wish I could say I've regrouped, but I can't.

I wish I could say I have an eating plan set with less sugar and salt and smaller portions, but I can't.  I wish I could say I figured out the exercise thing, that I spent hours today in the rose garden, and that I feel very organized today.

I can't.

Because today was a day where I just vegged. No productive thoughts, no plans for how I'm going to balance home and work. Just a day home, doing laundry and working a bit in the sewing room.

Am I trying to put off the inevitable? The notion that maybe I really won't be able to maintain and focus on myself and others because work will infuse my every thought? The notion that, after 164 days of writing and taking pictures, I might lose what I know to be important?

Today was a day of more questions than answers. So I did what I do when I'm frustrated, confused, or am trying to avoid things.

Retreat (okay, hide) in my sewing room.

While I may not be making progress right now personally, in that room I can make progress on sewing projects. Like my latest baby quilt for charity. On Day 46 I had put the top together, but it took all the way until today for me to finally get around to finishing it.