Day 760

Happy Easter! Says who? Me.

And the cat. (At least that's what I think she is saying.)

Day 759

I'm not a big fan of chocolate. Yeah, I'll eat it, but it certainly isn't my go-to snack. Heath bars aren't something I care for either. But today hubby made some brownies with Heath pieces melted over the top. Oh, my. Now I can learn to like these!

Day 758

Looking at my front flower bed it's clear that it was a cold winter. Looking pretty bare out there.

Day 757

I made that call. Cancelled my books for the blind training. Made me sad to do it, but it had to be done. My health is spiraling downward and it is getting difficult to maintain even the little bit of normalcy I have. It seems like every time my health hits a low it winds up being a lower low than the time before. I've got to be hitting the illness rock bottom pretty darn soon. (Funny though, I thought all those other times were rock bottom. What little do I know!)

I managed to do two things today. Take a super long nap (didn't wake up until 7 PM) and box up things for eBay. I was able to squeeze most things into the boxes and packages I had, but I lost the battle of trying to get the orange fabric in the box.

Tomorrow is a new day and the fight will begin again. And I'm not just talking about fabric.

Day 756

I have a dreaded phone call to make. I've been putting it off all day, even putting it off until tomorrow morning, all because I'm hoping for a miraculous recovery.

It started with difficulty getting up out of bed. A having-to-hang-onto-the-walls kind of difficulty. Then there was the feeling of shaking on the inside. Then hands not able to grasp things. One full day of dropping everything I picked up. The culmination of all those symptoms didn't necessitate a call to the doctor, but yesterday's trip to the vet's office did.

Me, the driver. Me, the person who got carsick. (Who gets carsick when they're driving?) That's when I knew something was up. Add in the inability to focus, the hard time finding the right word, and those ceilings and walls that won't stop moving.

According to the rheumatologist I fall into the 2% of people that suffer such reactions due to the infusion medication. Like vertigo. Miserable, dizzying, nauseating, can't keep my eyes open long before getting sick vertigo. They tell me it should get better.

It better get better. That's why I haven't made that phone call yet. The one that cancels my training for my books for the blind work. Tomorrow is supposed to be my first training session. Last week's was cancelled because of the trainer and now I'm afraid I won't make this one. I can force myself through fatigue and stiffness and pain - I have lots of practice with that - but I can't force myself through nausea and dizziness.

I want to go to sleep and wake up normal. (Or at least as normal as I'll ever get.) In the meantime kitty is keeping me company.